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The Classic 3.0 is FINALLY HERE!

9 THINGS TO REMEMBER

Posted on September 08 2015

9 THINGS TO KEEP IN MIND TODAY

#9   Death is the number 1 killer in the world.

 
#8   Life is sexually transmitted.
 
#7   Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
 
#6   Men have two motivations: hunger and hanky panky, and they can't tell them apart.  If you see a gleam in his eyes, make him a sandwich.
 
#5   Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day.  Teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks, months, maybe years.
 
#4   Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the hospital, dying of nothing.
 
#3   All of us could take a lesson from the weather.  It pays no attention to criticism.
 
#2   In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird.  Now the world is weird, and people take Prozac to make it normal.
 
#1   Life is like a jar of jalapeno peppers.  What you do today may be a burning issue tomorrow.
 
BEST DAY EVER
9 THINGS TO KEEP IN MIND TODAY
 
#9   Death is the number 1 killer in the world.
 
#8   Life is sexually transmitted.
 
#7   Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
 
#6   Men have two motivations: hunger and hanky panky, and they can't tell them apart.  If you see a gleam in his eyes, make him a sandwich.
 
#5   Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day.  Teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks, months, maybe years.
 
#4   Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the hospital, dying of nothing.
 
#3   All of us could take a lesson from the weather.  It pays no attention to criticism.
 
#2   In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird.  Now the world is weird, and people take Prozac to make it normal.
 
#1   Life is like a jar of jalapeno peppers.  What you do today may be a burning issue tomorrow.